"There must be quite a few things a hot bath won't cure, but I don't know many of them."

When I was a little girl I never said no to bathtime. My mom never had to wrestle me into the tub when I needed a bath. I practically leapt in, very willing to take one. I would lay in the water until it got cold and my fingers and toes were comparable to raisins. I piled up the bubbles giving myself soapy mohawks and foamy clothes.

15 years later I still love the water just as much. I prefer baths to showers and will spend hours soaking. I admit to continuing the mohawk sculpting.

Last night I had myself a candlelit bath and it was great. I had on my feng shui music and I was totally chill for about an hour and a half. I used a bath fizzy for the first time ever and I was completely enthralled. It was like carbonated soap that smelled really good.

Laying in the water I felt so at ease. Baths always do that to me. The water just rinsed away all my worries. I may not have the time to go take yoga classes or get massages, but I think a hot bath is just as good. Add the music and candle and it's probably better. =)

"I cling to my imperfection, as the very essence of my being"

The other day something truly vital to know in life clicked for me. No lightbulb turned on over my head, but I did suddenly feel a great relief and renewing of confidence.

You do not have to be perfect to be beautiful.

It seems simple(it is) and well-known(it is not). I have always found beauty in other people who are considered unique. Not just in physicalities, but in their personality. I love quirks. Its the things that don't fit the mold that really appeal to me. My mom never seems to be able to see what it is I see in the guys I am attracted to and in the women I find beautiful. If I use the word beautiful to describe a woman with a strong nose, tight lips and fiery eyes my mom will correct me and call her "a handsome woman." Who is to say she is not beautiful? She doesn't need soft fetaures and full lips to have beauty. To my mom the people I see something in are always too skinny, or too severe, or too weird looking. Every person is "too" something. My liking of the different ones started in preschool with my crush on the the boy who wore all green. I'm just fine with not being too into the all-american boys, but what I hadn't been able to get past until now, was that this concept of beauty in imperfection applies to me too.
When I look in the mirror I don't see much that I like. Or maybe it isn't that I don't like what I see, but I find so much that I think could be changed. I'm searching for perfection in my face and body even though I know it can't happen. I know I can't be perfect, and without realizing it that is what made me never really feel I was beautiful. I hadn't internalized that beauty does not equal perfection. I am not exempt from the idea that differences should be treasured. The fact that my nose is a bit long does mean I am not feminine. The fact that my stomach is not flat does not mean that I have a terrible body. The fact that my hair is frizzy doesn't mean that I can't be glamorous.

I am no different from the people around me. Or maybe I am very different and that is what makes me who I am. Perhaps now I can begin to love my own differences the way I love everyone elses.

Tradition is a pain in my...

Sometimes you do things just because its the way its always been done. So in honor of the commercial side of the Easter holiday I dyed some eggs this evening.

It was not a pleasant experience.

I got dye all over my fingers, the coloring wasn't working properly and a third of my eggs were cracked.

It was just one of those times where I wanted to say screw tradition.

Wait I feel like that almost every day.